Hello Everyone on Christmas day, I know most of you have been waiting to hear how David's life journey is coming along. David and I have been riding the "unknown" with you this whole time, waiting from moment to moment- breathing in breaths of belief, light and peace; if you only knew the whole story- it's truly amazing. David and I started a journal and photo album while he was staying at the Venture hospital in Southern California.
I am deeply sorry it's taken so long to write- we know how you've been waiting and it's frustrating not getting to you right away. However, there was not a moment to spare. The current of events, activities, and healing regiments have been non-stop and obviously the priority. David's and my supreme focus the last 3 weeks has been transitioning carefully back to the San Diego cancer clinic in Tijuana. Beyond that- David's and my focus has been initiating the deepest level of healing he's ever gone though before. Both of us have stepped into the unknown and springs of deep soul renewal and courage have accompanied David this whole way.
I am Jennifer Faubert, David's good friend, and business partner. David and I started this healing journey together in August when he wasn't feeling well and we reunited during his stay at Venture Hospital 3+ weeks ago. David asked me to stand by him through this health challenge and we made a pact to do it together. I'll be staying with David as long as he requests. My belief in his spirit is supreme and I'm so clear of my purpose here and our intensions. My commitment is to be an anchor for what his spirit wants. It will unfold in front of all of us in time.
Leila and Tana, David's sisters and I have been looking at how open to be in this latest update with you all and in discussing it with David, he wants you to really know his journey, his joys and sadness the last few weeks. Our lives have floated along like buoys through the tide pools and waves and our courage and belief in what's possible have kept us going, focused and relatively peaceful in a sea of other peoples opinions and our tides of emotions.
I'm not sure where the last update left off, so here's a brief recap: In November David's cancer specialist, Dr. Munos recommended that David get a procedure done that wasn't offered at the clinic in Mexico. Heather Haun, David's last caregiver, took David to a hospital just over the border in the US to facilitate this. Dr. Munos also recommended radiation on a vertebrae in David's neck could greatly reduce his pain from bone cancer. David's family found a hospital nearer to them in Ventura County, Southern California where he stayed over a week, received radiation and was loved and cared for by his family.
Although the radiation appears to have greatly reduced David's neck pain, the hospital stay was extremely taxing on his immune system because of the intensity of narcotics and other pharmaceuticals given to him. David also encountered immense opposition from his doctors regarding his belief that he can heal, in his belief in alternative medicine and choosing the right pathway for him. I remember being there at the hospital everyday and the doctors would come and remind him of his predicament, and essentially remind us of their shortcomings as physicians. During these days David raised up to be an even more magnificent warrior and despite what the doctors verbally re-enforced, despite the heavy sedation meds, he got stronger, became more active and clearer everyday and requested to return to Dr. Munos as soon as possible as that was always David's first choice.
Dean, David's brother, and I urgently organized David's hospital exit back to Mexico. With just over a day, each of David's family members, along with Alyssa, David's good friend and past wife experience and myself hustled our butts to put all the ends together. Tana, Nathan, Tana's husband, Alyssa and myself traveled by mini van and by car transporting David, our stuff and groceries back to Mexico.
I knew that David's health during the transition and the coming weeks would be very fragile; there was dealing with the cancer, but now dealing with the effects and residuals of his hospital stays. We want to be clear how it's been, but above everything else David wants you to know and I want to share how extraordinary and remarkable his resiliency has been. There have been times when I wondered if he'd make it through and he has each time. David knew each and every step that this was just one more marker to pass towards healing. Two steps forward, one huge step back and then one giant leap forward. I've been blown away and deeply inspired by our ability to keep believing and loving our way through these challenges and accepting the gems and lessons of each day. David's resilience is golden and flowing.
Here's just a very narrow snapshot of a few things David and I have been dealing with. At the hospital David was dosed with a couple heavy narcotics that are known to have very dangerous side effects to a person in his condition and his doses were dangerously high. After arriving back to Mexico David's hallucinations deeply intensified from the meds. During our first week in Mexico Dr. Munos decided to carefully eliminate these drugs and replaced them with other gentle pain meds. However, even after removing the meds David's hallucinations kept intensifying and he went into morphine withdrawals. This was extremely intense and constant for David and me. It's been over two weeks now- the doctors have been detoxifying him and his hallucinations and disorientation are almost gone.
David was also dealing with the effects of radiation to his neck. I hear from Leila and the Doctors here that the radiation is like having the worst sunburn of your life multiplied by 2 or 3 and now imagine putting that inside your throat. They also said that the radiation effects will persist and may increase over the coming weeks. Our first week down here David had unbelievable throat pain; he was so scared to swallow that he'd hold on to any liquids or saliva in his mouth. Constantly around the clock our first week here David would choke every 10 minutes. It was like watching someone drawing in water- it was very scary for both of us. We quickly developed an emergency plan to deal with the choking.
It's been 24/7 the last couple weeks and David knew that he just had to get through it, it was temporary, it was something happening to his body and we'd get through it. I'd love all of you to know that although David's immune system is extremely fragile; his resiliency has brought him some GREAT improvements over the last couple weeks.
David's pain level has dropped so low now, to where it was mid August. He mostly sleeps through the nights and he's started putting on a bit of weight. His digestive system is actively up and running, most of his blood markers are looking up and up, he swallows now, drinks and just starting eating again last night. And his clarity of mind is rapidly returning as his body now is detoxifying.
David's on an extensive, time-consuming health regiment that I'm administering through guidance from his doctors. David and I also start off and end most days with prayer/meditation/visualization work, light stretching with lots and lots of body work and lymphatic message through the day and night. It's funny because during the summer he talked about wanting to experience the life of Sophie, his cat. He wondered how it was to be a pampered cat. Well David's getting all of it now.
The community here at the Dali Suites, where we have residency is sooo supportive, collective and loving. All the courageous souls- people with cancer and their caregivers that have traveled from all over the States and the world- we share our stories, our sadness and most all our victories together. Cindy, a nurse from Florida who left her family and work two months ago to be here for her brother, David, who has cancer in his pancreas, liver, lymph nodes, adrenals and who has various dangerous complications, has become a close friend. Cindy's taught me how to give needles, and tricks about giving IVs. We take turns crying on each other shoulders when we're scared or frustrated. When we have positive updates about our David's we run to each other. Yesterday she shared how her brother’s tumors have reduced dramatically and after two months his body is finally starting to heal. There is another man I met that first came to the clinic with only 4 days to live the doctors’ say. He had pancreatic cancer. These days he's almost clear, healthy, vibrant and active. I've been told this is the place where miracles happen. There are many stories and people like this here. We've all become so close.
David is in love with all the lovely people that come around from Dali suites to visit him and they are in love with him; his brilliant smile melts everyone’s heart. There is a house keeper, Marta, who only speaks Spanish, but each time she sees David, she cries because she feels his heart and she explains that he has a Corazon muy granda. She has been an amazing support.
At the San Diego Clinic, most of the people have stage 4 cancer or have been classified as terminal by their oncologists back home. The clinic is very modest, and quiet where people receive their treatment if they're strong enough to go in each day. The team of doctors is soooo loving, so kind and generous. Dr. Mancillas is personally attending to David and he always greets me with the biggest bear hugs, and reminds David and I that we are such big people- we are so strong and he loves us. David to him is the "BIG MAN" courageous like a giant.
David is clear that getting through this is only worth while if he has a life that's worth living- and he doesn't want to go back to living the same life he had. When you're looking at death you get clear what doesn't work, what you've been surviving and putting up with in your life- what may have given you the cancer in the first place, and if your desire and will is big enough you reach for what you're REALLY committed to, what really makes your heart sing. For David it's Joy, Love and doing his service work.
David also knows how much all of you adore and care for him deeply. During the times he was hallucinating he actually talked about you in his dreams. I heard many of your names mentioned over and over again. He was actually worried about many of you. In this time of facing pain and dis-ease he's thinking of your wellbeing along with his own. And his Xango business partners- he's done so many 3-way presentations for you during the days and at nights. Some nights I tell him to stop working Xango and go to sleep. I say wouldn't you like to dream about other things like Angels or dolphins or beautiful fields, and he says my Xango people need me. He says he has to be there for people and I say be there for yourself and they'll take care of themselves- they're capable.
Just to add a note about David's dreams... Winnie the Pooh has been a popular visitor here- he often dances on the ceiling, so have Archangel Michael and Master Hilarian. We also have a family of yellow duckies living in our apt David's made friends with. I call David Happy Feet because he wiggles them around day and night, and he has decided that the best use for his belly button is as a pill holder, so when it's time for meds or vitamins I put it in his belly button- it's actually a very practical choice. Despite all the scares and ups and downs we have fun and good laughs.
Many of you have been calling and calling his cell or mine and I'm so sorry we haven't been available. We virtually have no reception here the last couple weeks. Beyond that there's no time now to monitor all his calls, voicemails or emails. I kindly ask that only David's family and a few of David's closest closest friends call him in a week. We're in contact with his family during the week and when David is up for speaking and wants to speak to any you we'll call. David knows how much you love him and I remind him of this everyday. Also a number of you send emails strongly suggesting what I should be doing with David and feeding him- again I thank you for your deep care and good intentions, please trust trust trust that David is in excellent hands with his team of world class cancer doctors/ special cancer nutritionists. Also my background (among many things) is as a cleansing and detoxification coach & consultant and I used to run a very specialized restaurant for people with health challenges- David's team here is united and has his back.
If any of David's closest friends want to come down, David and I can use the assistance, but please know that you'll be working with me side by side through out much of the day and night. If you're an extremely attentive and observant person we can use your help. And just a heads up- the Dali Suites charges an extra $15 per person per night, if you come down you'll have to cover those costs because David's budget doesn't allow for this, thank you!
If any of you would like to send mail or packages, please use the clinic's address in San Diego. Items will be brought across to the boarder to us:
David Engle/ Jennifer Faubert 555 Saturn Blvd. 452-B, San Diego, CA, 92154
For future updates please refer to David's Blog posted and written by Kelly LaValley.
Again thank you everyone for holding a space of clear possibility for David and his life, thank you for all your support- the seen and unseen, known and unknown. Thank you for the love and contribution.
On behalf of David and myself- have wonderful holidays.
With Gladness, Love & Resiliency,
David & Jennifer
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